Myth#1 “My In-Laws Will love Me”

Everyone has a desire to be loved and appreciated. Wouldn’t it be great if all in-law relationships were as close and loving as that of Ruth and her mother-in-law Naomi from bible? Yet many aren’t.

Many of us woman when we marry, we have this hope that everything would be finally  perfect. If we never had much of a family earlier or have never  been close to mother we tend to ask God to give us a family that we could feel close to.

We finally marry this man who comes from a big, loving  (so we think) family, with many sisters and brothers. Husband assures “They’ll love you, just like you”.

Everything seems good in the beginning. Mother-in-law talks lovingly and compliments. Dad-in-law  seems to like us and so does the siblings. But slowly things change, mother-in-law seems so critical about the way we cook, clean or take care of husband, children etc.  Dad-in-law later acts like we don’t exist and siblings have their own expectations.

Its like we cant do anything right.?!!!

We woman keep thinking that it would get better. Years pass by and it still doesn’t and finally come to point thinking we are not really part of the family.

It’s not that in-laws are evil. We just thought we’d be closer!!!

Well, some desires turn into expectations – expectations that may or may not be met. when it comes to relationships among imperfect people in a fallen world, there are no guarantees. Only God can love us in a way that exceeds our expectations. (see John 3:16;14:23). Our God is free from human biases and imperfections that mar our relationships.

Love is choice – an act of the will, rather than a feeling. During His time on earth, Jesus chose to love and serve others each and everyday. He came with an agenda- to show the full extent of his love (See John 13:1).

Like Jesus, we woman can choose to love our in-laws regardless of how they treat us. By choosing to love with the love of God, we choose to focus on what we can give, rather what we haven’t received. We can also choose to forgive.

But choosing to love doesn’t mean we turn into a doormat. The choice to love can also mean love ourselves enough to establish boundaries, particularly in relationships where abuse is involved. Tough love is still love.

“Love is patient…..

It doesn’t dishonour other,

it is not self-seeking

it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs.  1 Corinthians :4-5”

Inspired from woman’s bible- True Identity. 

Sharing the word for all woman across the globe to help  become who you are in Christ. 

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